Book Review: 13 ACRES OF HELL by Paul Popiel

13 ACRES OF HELL: OUR LITTLE CORNER OF THE WORLD by Paul Popiel (Self-published, September 25, 2025) Paperback, 344 pages. ISBN # 9798266993679  ASIN # B0FSY9CN4B  

Synopsis on the Goodreads website . . . . .

Conner didn't really have any strong feelings about clowns.

But after one smothered him into unconsciousness with a handful of colorful hankies and he woke up tied to a chair surrounded by slashers, he's formed an opinion.

The clown in question, Bloody Bettina, wants nothing more than to hunt him down in a maze of broken-down RVs with her slasher friends. They want to spill his blood, sever his limbs, eat his heart, you get the picture.

But when he manages to survive their death maze, Bloody Bettina is so impressed that she decides to take him on as her apprentice. Conner doesn't understand all that entails but having no other good option, he accepts.

Now he has to make it through Bloody Bettina's lessons, deal with an enemy he somehow created on day one of training, protect a sidekick he didn't ask for, and survive the ire of the clown's slasher friends, who aren't thrilled with him being added to their group.

My Four-Star Review on the Goodreads website . . . . .

  Paul Popiel is a horror aficionado, and his book is a crazy quilt homage to classic films with a dash of cosmic horror and Dungeons & Dragons campaign mazes thrown in. While reading 13 ACRES OF HELL I was reminded of SAW, NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET, HELLRAISER and KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE. Fans of extreme horror and slasher fare will have a field day exploring these thirteen acres.

 

   There’s an entire sub-culture, an underground economy of sorts, within Popiel’s wildly inventive setting with a number of competitive cabals working diligently to perfect their malicious, murderous craft. There is even a support structure for the various divisions, with secretive hospitals/emergency rooms and mysterious stores that cater to slasher needs in the way of supplies, special clothing, and armaments.

 

   The story follows Conner, an ambitious real estate agent who gets lured into one of the diabolical gauntlets and manages to survive his first encounter. His choice is to either become a new recruit in the cabal operated by killer clown Bloody Bettina . . .  or die horribly.  As he fully immerses himself into this strange world and even begins to develop friendships/relationships within the cabal, he struggles whether to attempt an escape or to gain merit and rise within the ranks. 

    Somehow the slasher society manages to evade the notice of the authorities, at least through a large portion of the novel. There are some fascinating aspects to this world that don’t receive a full explanation. The structure raises several unanswered questions, among them “how do these people generate an income and put bread on the table?”  Theres a familiar rule for readers of science-fiction when the settings seem to be improbable or confusing - - “suspend your disbelief, and go with the flow”.  13 ACRES OF HELL is one of the first horror novels where I’ve applied that rule. Just go with it, and be entertained. 

   Trigger warning: there are many bloody scenes of extreme violence as well as erotica. Readers sensitive to these subjects should approach with caution.

    This might be hard to digest without the many scenes of dark humor that help to break the tension. The centerpiece of the novel is a tale of budding friendship and even a romantic relationship. 

   Just as those classics mentioned above were too big to be contained to one film, Popiel’s world is worth more volumes. The ending leaves an opening for more should this first novel attract its proper and deserved audience.